Leonie Traub | Katharina Vitt | Sarah Maier | 16.02.2026

When people experience conflicts or violence in couple relationships, they often do not seek support from the violence support system or the police [1,2]. Relatives from the private environment often play an important role in the support process and can be a bridge to formal contact points [3]. In German-speaking countries, we know little about the role of caregivers and places in the everyday environment. The aim of this survey was to investigate where affected people discuss their situation.

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Extract

The aim of this survey was to investigate whom affected individuals turn to when they experience conflicts in intimate relationships, and where they discuss these situations.

To this end, a questionnaire was developed that asked about various trusted persons and places in participants’ everyday environments as potential sources of support. The questionnaire also allowed respondents to indicate their reasons for choosing specific trusted persons and locations. The survey was conducted via one of Germany’s largest parenting portals* and was completed by 1,141 individuals. Four out of five participants reported speaking with trusted persons about troubling or escalating situations in their relationship. The most frequently mentioned trusted persons were friends and family members. When choosing whom to confide in, the person’s level of knowledge about intimate partner violence and a supportive, partisan attitude played an important role.

Three quarters of participants considered their home to be a suitable place to talk about troubling or escalating situations in their relationship. In addition, more than one in ten respondents also considered online forums, favorite cafés, women’s cafés or groups, as well as playgrounds, daycare centers, schools, or parent–child groups. Key factors in choosing a location were the ability to speak freely, good accessibility, and protection from discrimination.

Trusted persons play an important role in recognizing conflicts in intimate relationships as violence (5). Such recognition is often a prerequisite for making use of formal support services [4]. Therefore, involving trusted persons and everyday locations in support services may offer a way to reach individuals affected by intimate partner violence at an early stage and with low barriers to access.

[1]: Müller, U., & Schröttle, M. (2004). Lebenssituation, Gesundheit und Sicherheit von Frauen in Deutschland. Eine repräsentative Untersuchung von Gewalt gegen Frauen in Deutschland. BMFSFJ, Berlin.

[2]: European Union Agency for Fundamental Rights (FRA) (2014). Gewalt gegen Frauen: eine EU -weite Erhebung. Ergebnisse auf einen Blick. Abgerufen am 10.12.2025.

[3]: Schucan Bird, K., Stokes, N., Rivas, C., Tomlinson, M., Delve, M., Gordon, L., Gregory, A., Lawrence, K., & O’Reilly, N. (2023). Training Informal Supporters to Improve Responses to Victim-Survivors of Domestic Violence
and Abuse: A Systematic Review. Trauma, Violence, & Abuse.

[4]: Schmidt-Semisch, H., Stahlke, I., Rubscheit, S., Schnepf, F., & Jochem, G. (2024). Das Bremer Hilfesystem für gewaltbetroffene Frauen – eine qualitative Erhebung der Betroffenenperspektive. Prävention und
Gesundheitsförderung, 19(2), 198–205. 

[5]: Johnson, I. D., & Belenko, S. (2021). Female Intimate Partner Violence Survivors’ Experiences With Disclosure to Informal Network Members. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 36(15–16).

*: The survey was developed and analyzed in collaboration with Rund ums Baby. The Rund ums Baby parenting magazine includes a discussion forum for parents, an expert forum, and information on a wide range of family-related topics.

**: As part of the accompanying research conducted by Gewaltfrei in die Zukunft e.V., collaboration took place with the Survivors’ Advisory Board (Betroffenenrat) of Signal e.V.. This included a professional exchange on the language used to describe violence in intimate partner relationships, during which a certain speechlessness in connection with the disclosure of experiences of violence was discussed. “The Survivors’ Advisory Board is a political body […] whose aim is to make the experiences and perspectives of those affected visible and to bring about sustainable change at the societal, political, and professional levels.” (Excerpt from the Board’s self-description).